It has been a while since I last posted. I still go through my favourite blogs on a daily basis, but just couldn't write anything myself. Inspiration just wasn't there.
I think, that's because I was trying to put myself together. Every once in a while, I re-evaluate my life and what I am doing, and the big re thinking of my life and me as a good person happens every 10 years. I suppose I do it almost on a daily basis, but the BIG re-evaluation happens when I turn the big, in this case 40!
When I turned 30, I felt a sense of being at peace with myself. After very turbulent 20's, 30's felt like a new life began.
Then 40 came on the 12th of August, and I was waiting for that BIG change, that BIG shift. And it finally happened this weekend, it just happened. I realised, I need to re-think the way I think and the way I embrace change.
Change is something I find difficult, but have had so many big changes in the last three years, that I just went with it. Now, I have decided that I am going to treat "the changes" a little bit differently. Not as something I have to fight and go along with, but something I embrace and welcome. In fact, I will seek it on a daily basis. Whether that be in the route I take to work, or what I do once I leave school where I work, but in everything else. Not only a change in what I do, but how I think too. At least one change a day, of any sort will do.
I am on the whole a positive person and always see the good in things and people. It's my default position and I am often told I am too naive and I trust people too easily.
I have been questioning that lately, and started to think that I might be doing something wrong. Then, my gut instinct said that is the exactly the way to go, I just need to take care of myself in the process.
So, I stopped listening to the sceptics, and went back to thinking that everybody is good, unless and if they prove otherwise (and I am determined to stay that way and not make the change in the way I think on that front).
So, here I am, that much older, maybe not wiser, I don't know, but definitely ready to embrace whatever life has to offer next. I am ready. A little bit scared, but innocent and naive the way I have always been, curious, but now a little careful too. I am determined that my 40's count even more that the 30's did.
And, so what has this picture have anything to do with what I am writing in this post?
Well,... pictures I take usually drive my posts. This time, it is a bit different. I took this one on my last holiday, and I was amazed how even through concrete, nature found its way, and blossomed.
So, I suppose the picture is a metaphor for how I am feeling at the moment.
I know that this post is unusually "heavy", but hope that you at least enjoy the wonder of the picture, if nothing else.
Hope you are all having a good week and are able to embrace the challenge and the change that comes your way.
Red xx
2 comments:
Hello:
Belated birthday greetings for 12th. August, and many happy returns.
Our approach to life, at least where people are concerned, is to trust them until they let you down which, in the main, seems to work very well and, surprisingly, we have few disappointments. So, please, do not change that aspect of yourself for to be positive and optimistic in life is such a good thing. Indeed, banish the sceptics!!
We rather embrace change as part of life's great adventure - and you never know where it will lead!
Change is always hard, but it sounds like you are embracing it in a positive way. Last sunday on the long drive from the beach I had a moment of over thinking my life in a more minor way (you know when everyone is quiet and tired and you just stare out of the window and think) A lot is going to change in half a year for me, I finish my final master project then and who knows what will be next. It is a scary thought but also nice in a way that everything still can happen.. :)
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